Wednesday, September 25, 2002
so, i realized that more often than i do, i need to remember that i have great friends who love me, a family who loves me dearly, and a God who loves me so much that he sent his SON to die for me...that's a very humbling thought. i had a mostly wonderful day so far. i say mostly cause i felt sick after lunch but anyway, i digress. i double booked myself for lunch today, which some people might think is bad, but to me, that just means that two people want to to see me bad enough to schedule a time to get together. it was an amazing feeling. my one big issue of the day(afternoon?) is that there is this girl that ive known since i transferred here and the more i get to know her, the less i seem to believe that she is an honest person. in that, i dont mean she is a horrible person, i just think that she makes up stories or embellishes truths to make herself sound better and more appealling to those around her. just now, that gets me to thinking...i wonder how much we all do that. i mean, how 100% completely honest are we all the time, or any of the time. its in those rare moments and friendships that we really are ourselves. but this girl, the way she is, makes me question why? why does she act this way, why do any of us pretend to be something we're not? oh well, perhaps that is something to figure out throughout my life...maybe one day. okay, enough of the tirade. i still have an hour left before i have to go to my internship, so i am going to go be productive and read for class or something.
i realize that from some peoples reactions to my ponderings, i should put this little disclaimer in it... i am fine, its just that the only time i feel the need to write is when someone has pissed me off or im just having a bad day, or just a bad afternoon. so, really, i am not mentally distressed or anything, i just havent figured out how to not be so emotional.
Monday, September 23, 2002
you know, i really hate when you like a person and you like this person for a long time and you think that this person likes you back and then they end up hurting you simply because they really dont like you back. i really hate that. i also hate when your friends are all freinds with this person and they think that hes great and talk about him around you all the time and all you want to do is make them shut up. dont they realize that it still hurts to hear about him even though you want nothing to do with him anymore. geez, why do i feel like im back in jr. high?